Membership Chair

Our preschool just had elections for the Board for this coming school year and I was elected second Vice President. Thinking the work would actually be too much in person stuff (social anxiety and all), I asked to be appointed membership chair instead, since it seemed like more of a work-from-home type job. Last night, the new board met with the outgoing board and we paired up with the person who is currently doing the job we'll be taking on, so I met with the membership team. Both of the moms (the whole board is moms, but that's another post) who shared the membership position last year say it is a massive job and that it really works best for someone who doesn't work and had tons of time to devote to it. The more they talked about the roles and responsibilities and showed me the three inch binder I'll inherit, the more overwhelmed I started feeling. It bothered me all night and this morning I started having some serious second thoughts. Not just about the board position, but about preschool in general. 

I'm not sure we should go back next year. Louis will totally disagree, I'm sure, but I know he doesn't have a sense at all about how much I have truly hated this past year. So here's where my difficulty comes from. Every single day is a struggle, from the yelling and nagging to get her showered, dressed, and fed in the morning so we can be on time, to the clinginess of her not wanting me to leave, to the girl friendship drama, to the politics of dealing with other parents, to acceptance of the damn play-based only curriculum, to the endless parent ed meetings and other co-op commitments that just suck the life out of me. I hate it all. I've put up with everything because I just assumed the payout would be an awesome education that would make all the pain worth it, but I'm totally doubting this now.

What exactly is the point?

What is she getting out of preschool that she couldn't get from me at home and with regular play dates? Other than the exposure to multiple activity stations at one time instead of one at a time, I truly don't know. Everything (field trips, art projects, cooking projects, books, dress up, science, games, sandbox and bikes) that she has done at school we could have done at home. Without the nagging and drama and tears.

Did we just waste a year? Is there something magical she's picked up that I'm not seeing? The "social skills" hype is way overrated.

As I listened to the membership moms talk about what my job will be like and how many hundreds of hours they've put in, I just found myself wondering if it's all worth it. Is this something I really have to do? Hundreds of hours away from my kid seems pretty horrible, especially without a great payout. What's the point?

I definitely need some perspective and wish I could talk honestly with some of the other parents. I can't be the first mom to hate preschool. I just cannot see putting so much time and energy into a job that I care nothing about. I'd much rather invest my time into organizing a homeschool co-op. Ugh, preschool, you suck.