Monday

I spent my last few hours at Casa packing and cleaning up my room. I left the letter and a gift for A where I knew she would find it. I washed and replaced the bedding. I returned the rental car to Enterprise, picking up lunch on the way, since I knew one of the interns was craving meat. Back at the clinic, I hung out with the staff midwives for a couple hours and before I knew it, it was time to leave for the airport.

Saying good-bye when it's time to leave has always been the hardest part of being at Casa. There's just no way around it. I got hugs and compliments from the interns and lots of well-wishes (including a "go get pregnant already!") from everyone. One of the staff midwives drove me to the airport, gave me a hug, and then she was gone.

By the time I checked in at the airport, I was completely exhausted, emotionally spent, and financially done. I don't even know how I managed to go through the motions of getting on the two flights back to Oakland.

By the time I landed, though, I felt a little better. It was great to see my mom again and I'm glad she was able to pick me up and drop me off so I could fit in a shower before Louis came home. Seeing Louis was good :) Sometimes I think my trips away are worth it just for the reunion at the end. I missed him a whole lot.

I missed my home, my bed, my bathroom, my car, my closet full of non-scrub clothes...

It's always such a thrill to flush toilet paper and drink our delicious tap water those first few days back home. And the variety of fresh fruit and vegetables in the stores, wow!

I realized after this last trip that even though my home is here, a part of me will always live in El Paso and at the clinic. It was such an important part of my life. I didn't know it at the beginning, but I was meant to be a Casa-trained midwife. It's an honor, really. I wouldn't have it any other way.